Never gettin' drunk again
by Slayers64
Summary: Getting drunk off his ass, Shizuo tries to make his way home but ends up at the informant's doorstep instead. He decides once and for all that he is going to get one over on Izaya in his drunken state, but things don't go as planned. Warning: Heavy smutt. Collab: CloudsofSand & Slayers64 One shot.


**Never gettin' drunk again**

**-CloudsofSand and Slayers64**

**Disclaimer: We do not own durarara **

* * *

_-Shizuo's POV-_

It was no secret that Ikebukuro was a city full of life. It was a city that never seemed to sleep. The residents of the city lived a very fast paced life style, which caused a lot of stress on people from time to time.

People might assume that I am immune to things like stress, but they are wrong. I actually get stressed out a lot, no thanks to a certain flea who insists on constantly invading my life. Seriously, who the fuck did he think he was?! The fucking Pope?! The guy pisses me off . . ., hence why I am sitting at a bar, drinking like I was a fish out of water.

Err . . ., I think that's the expression.

I'm drinking a lot okay?

I let out a deep sigh as I wrap my finger tips around my third full glass, before drinking it all right then and there. It's probably not the brightest idea . . ., but fuck it. Izaya pissed me off so bad today that I don't want to think about anything anymore. Goddamn cockroach. I slam the glass down on the bar top and the tender promptly returns with another. That one is quickly consumed though and I know that I am reaching my limit . . .

It might come to a surprise to people, but I do have limits. I place the cash on the counter and thank the bartender before walking outside. I push the glass door open ad feel the breeze hit my face. Shivering slightly, I sway a little because of the wind. I place my hand on the wall to prevent myself from falling over.

. . .

Okay, maybe I'm a little tipsy. Get the fuck over it.

I start walking, but I don't know where I am walking. My mind is in a haze, so I just let my feet guide me to god knows where. I sway a little and stagger as I walk, but never lose my composure. I temporarily black out. You know how sometimes you're so deep in thought that you forget you're doing something? Yeah kind of like that. But the rain brings me back to reality and I look at my surroundings.

. . . Where the hell am I?

This doesn't look like 'Bukuro.

I pull out my phone to call Celty, knowing that if this continues, then I would be really fucked, but the mother fucker slips out of my hand and falls onto the wet ground; battery and back flying out onto the wet grass! What the fuck! Why aren't these things drop proof?!

I pick up the battery and examine the wet piece of my phone.

Looks like I'm lost. I look around once again and notice a building that I really didn't care to notice. Anger started to rush inside me, as I narrowed my eyes at the building as if it morally offended me. Walking towards the fancy glass doors, I stumble through them and into the elevator up front.

"Izaaaayyyyyaaaaa-kuuunnn~"

* * *

_-Izaya's POV- _

I stare at my screen. The virtual text before me doesn't register as I read the same line over and over again. I can't help it though, I really am stressed. I've been working my ass off for days, nonstop. I haven't been able to get out at all this entire week and it's just been rather . . . taxing to say the least. Namie had grown fed up with me and had decided to finish her work up quickly, leaving me behind. I couldn't blame her; I was a bitch to deal with when I was like this. Oh well~ This particular assignment a client had given me was proving to be quite the trouble, and it was pissing me off, truthfully. I couldn't concentrate.

I wasn't hungry, I didn't need to use the restroom, and so I had nothing to distract myself from this work, so all my mind focused on was reading this same line again and again. Hell, I didn't even know what I was reading anymore.

The weather outside did little to help my mood either. The clouds were dark and dreary, screaming "storm" as the wind blew against trees and laundry lines outdoors.

It hadn't decided to pour yet, but I could tell that soon the rain would come down in buckets.

It was a shame, because I'd planned on going out to greet my lovely humans today . . .

Tapping my fingers against the desk before me, my mind began to wander. 'I wonder what's going on with the dollars right now.' I frowned. No. I shouldn't be thinking of that; I should be thinking about my work. If I get distracted, my work won't measure up to its true potential.

But I couldn't help it; I've been indoors the whole time these last couple of days. This assignment was really a pain in the ass. I wouldn't have done it at all, if the pay wasn't so good.

Sighing again, I allowed my gaze to drift to the window outside again, watching as a few random citizens ran along in the rain, umbrellas over their heads, as they rushed for safety before the storm hit.

'I really need a drink . . .' I couldn't help but think, as thunder rumbled overhead.

Having had enough of staring at a boring, old screen all day, I saved the information I had so far, and shut down the computer. Leaning back in my chair, I did a few random, half hearted spins, before stopping, and letting my gaze travel to the ceiling.

'I know what I need. . .' I thought as I got up from the chair at my desk, and made my way towards the staircase.

Reaching my hand up to the railing, I climbed my way up the stair case and headed towards my bathroom. Reaching the door at the end of the hall, I turned the knob and walked inside.

'Time for a nice, hot, relaxing bath~' I thought to myself, as I lazily began stripping off my clothes. Letting the articles of clothing fall to the ground, I turned the bath water on until I reached the desired temperature, and waited for the tub to fill.

Once the tub was filled, I turned the water off, and tentatively reached a foot in, before slipping the rest of my body into the soothing pool of warmth. Folding my arms back behind my head, I relaxed my body even more.

"Ah~ Just what I needed . . ."

* * *

_-__Shizuo's POV-_

The elevator came to a halt and I stumbled towards the door of my worst enemy. _Dunno why my legs brought me here, but might as well kick the flea's ass while here._ I didn't bother knocking and just smashed the door in. Fucking asshole; having a door to keep me out. Ha! Trucks can't stop me, why makes him think a door will?

I stumbled into the ritzy apartment of my worst enemy, scanning my eyes for Izaya, but not finding him anywhere. I walked into the living room and looked under the couch . . .

. . . He is _small_ okay?! Don't question me!  
I let his couch fall crooked and I look around the living area. The faint sound of water makes me think that the flea is in the bathroom. I start my way up his stairs, slipping and stumbling all the way up, before my forehead comes in contact with a door. My body weight crashed forth all at once and next thing I know, my body was in contact with something wet and soft.

* * *

_-Izaya's POV-_

I blinked.

I blinked again.

Then I rubbed my eyes.

But . . . the image just wouldn't go away!

"Sh-Shizu-chan?!" I had to make sure.

The blonde imbecile lifted his head, hair soaking wet. I shifted slightly, since his face was in a somewhat . . . awkward . . . area.

"Shizu-chan, what are you doing, you brute?!" He looked over at me for a second, before looking back down to a . . . . sensitive . . . . area.

"You have a small dick."

My mind blanked. 'Wha? Did I just hear him, right?' I wondered, confused as hell.

'Okay, gotta get my bearings right. I'm here . . . at my home, taking a bath, plus Shizuo, equals . . .?' I couldn't think straight, and so, I just focused on what the blond had said instead.

"What the hell, Shizu-chan! Why are you even looking there?! No wait, better yet, how did you get in here?!" I tried desperately to cover up, backing myself up against the wall, but it did little to help, since the tub was so small; we were already in such a close proximity.

Shizuo looked back up at me, thankfully. His eyes were slightly glazed over and I could definitely smell the alcohol on his breath. I yelped when his strong hand suddenly grabbed my . . . . !

"S-Shizuo! What the hell do you think you are doing?!"

"I'mma make ya pay flea." He slurred as he pulled forcefully on my male appendage.

"P-ay? What the hell Shizu-chan! Stop! You're drunk, you asshole!" I yelled, pushing the blond back, as I tried to stand up in the small space between us.

It seemed that Shizuo didn't like that idea though, because it caused him to slide himself fully into the tub, so his body was crushing mine.

"I fucking hate you." He said all of a sudden. _Like I didn't already know that_. I used the wet surface to my advantage, and managed to flip us around so that Shizuo's back was pressed to the bottom of the tub.

"You're fucking insane! Do you even know what you're doing, right now?!" I yelled, as I pinned him against the wall of the tub. His head was in danger of submerging.

He didn't respond; he merely sat up with me in his lap, and pressed me against the cold wall, causing a shiver to go through my spine.

"Fuck." He breathed out before leaning forward and biting my neck so hard it drew blood! I bit my lip to hold in a scream, as I tried to move the dead weight off of me in total shock.

"Shizuo, .out!" I yelled, before kicking him, blindly. It seemed like that did the trick, as the blond relinquished his hold of me, and I hurriedly leaned over the side of the tub to gather my knife- before I could do so however, the blond tugged me back in with one hand, just as my finger tips skimmed the blade's handle.

"Fuck!" I cursed. Before I could do anything else, the blond pressed me firmly to the other wall again, this time pinning both of my hands to the side of my head, as he towered over me. My eyes widened in shock. 'What the hell? What's happening here?' My mind was frantic as I tried to thrash around and roll him off of me . . ., to no avail. He grinned down at me.

"I'mma take ya control 'way" He slurred before pressing his lips against mine. 'Oh fuck no! This was not going to happen; I don't care if he was drunk or not!' I bite his lip hard, causing him to gasp and release mine. I twisted my body, trying to get free, with no luck. My back suddenly met the bottom of the tub and I mentally was thankful that I turned the water off, or I would be drowning at the moment. Not quite the way I wanted to go out.

Shizuo attacked my lips again.

Struggling, I kicked the brute's stomach, but he didn't so much as flinch. One hand released my own, quickly coming up to slide against my rib cage, kneading the flesh, tenderly. I shivered involuntarily, gasping, to which his tongue dove deeper into the depths of my mouth. With one hand free, I fisted my hand around dyed locks, tugging the hair back. Shizuo did nothing but kiss harder, his free hand coming up to tease one of my nipples. I shivered. I couldn't help it. It's . . . been a while. Besides, the heat was getting to me.

But if I was going to go through with this, I was not going to let this brute have control. I managed to flip us over once again and dug my hands under his vest.

"You're so wet Shizu-chan . . ." I said teasingly with lustful eyes staring down at shock, drunken hazed ones.

I saw the blond smirk. "Finally coming around, huh?" He asked, before dragging my face down once again to bite at my lip. Once given permission, he slipped his tongue inside and our two tongues fought for dominance. This went on for a while, before we both realized that neither one of us was going to submit, and so Shizuo began sucking lewdly on my tongue, instead. I groaned, clawing my hands down his clothed chest, before fiddling with the buttons of his vest.

The blonde let out a groan and thrust his hips upward to rub himself against my exposed length. I let out a soft moan as our lips parted. Our eyes were filled with lust as we attacked each other's mouths again. Teeth clashed together as tongues twisted and fought each other. I finally got the buttons undone and started to run my hands down Shizuo's side, and began to play with his belt next.

He groaned appreciatively, and I grinned. Undoing the belt and buttons, I got an idea and smirked, before bending down low, close to the blond's obvious erection, and closing my teeth around the zipper of his pants, dragging it downwards, my crimson eyes, never leaving his mocha ones.

It was true that I wasn't thinking straight and it was also true that I would probably regret this afterwards, but dammit, what was I supposed to do, when the brute was basically coming onto me?

Once the zipper was undone, I curled my fingers under the waistband of the pants and tugged the soaked article of clothing downwards. His length sprang free from the heavy, wet clothing. Damn! I am in no way _"small"_ as he mentioned before, but judging by his size . . ., I can see where he got that idea. I slip down and eye the tip hungrily, before licking it, quickly. Shizuo moaned, pushing himself up on his elbows to watch me.

Encouraged by this reaction, I grinned. This was too easy. _'Maybe Shizu-chan is a virgin?'_ I thought silently to myself. Leaning over more so, I allowed my hands to cup around the blonde's balls, before dragging my lips up the length of his erection. _Slowly and teasingly._ He gasped, a breathless sound escaping between his lips, and I felt a sense of narcissism wave over me. Yeah, I did have a bit of an ego, but really, when you're this talented, you can afford to have one.

I was about to part my lips and start to the suck on his length, when my back suddenly met the wall of the tub again. I growled in frustration as I looked up at the blonde. "You ain't fucking me!" He yelled as he grabbed my length harshly.

I winced in mild pain. "What the fuck, Shizu-chan! I was giving you HEAD." I brushed a hand through my wet bangs, pushing them back.

I can't believe this dolt!

"You ain't topping me, Flea." He growled simply, before leaning forward and—

"Fuck! Shizuo! You're not supposed to bite it!"

Honestly, how much of a virgin could this man be?!

I arched up against the wall. 'This idiot!' I didn't even know what the damn brute was talking about! One minute I was giving him a nice blow job, and then the next he's pushing me away! Last time I checked, bj's did not signify who was going to top. Well . . . then again, I suppose this time it does; after all, I ALWAYS top. Shizu-chan is no exception, especially since he's an amateur virgin at this.

But damn it, regardless of how I feel at the moment, I have to admit that the brute was a pretty fast learner. I closed my eyes tight, biting my bottom lip.

The sounds of the water moving caused me to open my eyes to see Shizu-chan nearly drowning himself trying to suck my dick! "What the hell Shizu-Chan!" I pull him above the water and he lets out a whine. Note to self: _Never get Shizuo drunk_.

I have to somehow get us out of the tub before the moron drowns himself. That would be a fun one to explain. 'So how did Shizuo end up dying naked in your tub?' Tch, annoying. "Let's get out Shizuo." I feel like I'm talking to a freaking five year old here!

He groaned. "Fiiiine . . ." Bluntly picking me up and throwing me across his shoulder, I blushed in embarrassment. "Shizuo! Put me down, I can walk on my own!"

He shrugged in response, just as he finished stepping out of the tub, and . . . promptly tossed me to the floor.

I yelled in surprise as my body fell hard onto the tiled floor. Can't this guy be just the slightest bit civilized? I pushed myself off the floor only to be pushed back down by a bruising kiss. I wrapped my arms around the blonde's neck again to make sure that I didn't fall hard once again. He slipped his tongue into my mouth and shifted his knee into my . . . sensitive area.

"F-fuck!" I groaned, putting extra emphasis on the f. "D-do that . . . again. You're doing . . . well." I complimented begrudgingly, my voice turning hoarse with pleasure. I brought my hands up to trail down the blonde's stomach, admiring the perfectly sculpted body before me. Feeling along his toned chest and abdomen, I pressed my fingers into the flesh, massaging as I made my way upwards.

Earning a grunt of approval and my reward, I reached the blonde's nipples, and paused, admiring them, as Shizuo panted, his eyes shut tight, as he continued to pleasure me, as I did to him. Sighing in appreciation, I allowed a finger to skim over a hardened bud, firmly, yet softly, eliciting a sharp gasp of surprise from my partner.

I smirked at the response and dipped my head down to capture the bud between my lips. Shizuo let put a loud moan, as he started to grind his knee more into my exposed flesh in response. I sucked harshly at the risen flesh, but was slowly losing focus as that devilish knee forced my attention elsewhere.

"Ahh . . . . S-Shizu-chan . . ." I thrust upwards and let out a gasp when I felt a rough hand grab my length.

Pumping slowly, I let out a ragged breath at the contact. "Sh-it!" I pressed my head to the floor, breathing in and out, and heating up. Drunken and lust filled Carmel eyes seemed to sparkle at me. "Heh . . ., you like that, Flea?" He purred, whispering into the contour of my neck. I shivered.

A wet, slick tongue slipped out between the blond's lips and caressed my neck gently, earning a soft mewl of enjoyment from me, before it was suddenly cut off by a harsh and unexpected bite.

"H-hhhhng! F-uck, Shi-shi-" Sharp teeth grinded into my neck, leaving a dark and prominent bite mark.

"You're mine now." He said in a low, seductive voice.

. . .

Okay, maybe Shizu-chan doesn't know what a "one night stand" means, but it doesn't mean that I'm suddenly his, just because we're about to have sex! Jeeze . . . I growled darkly and returned the favor by biting down on a patch of Shizuo's skin, hard. He let out a loud groan at my sudden action which caused me to smirk in spite of my thoughts.

Bringing his hands up to my hair, the blond tugged. Hard. I groaned at the sensation, before my lips were captured once more with his own. Our tongues clashed over and over again, fighting for dominance that neither of us would give. It felt as if I was being smothered. A stray hand left my hair and began trailing down my neck, sliding over my shoulders, past my chest, down my stomach . . .

I shivered and bucked hard at the feeling as a finger bluntly began probing around my hole.

"Fuck! Sh-Shizu-chan, wh-what the hell do you think you're doing?!"

I arched away from the finger, shock written all over my face.

"Orihara Izaya does NOT bottom to anyone!" I yelled, pissed off.

'Not to mention the dumbass forgot lube . . .'

Shizuo looked confused like the simpleton he was.

"You're smaller, you're going to take it!" He said as he suddenly thrusts the finger deep inside my hole.

"A-Ahh! Shizu-chan, stop!" I yelled and I yanked the mop of blonde hair up so he would look at me. 'He isn't listening to my dammit!' Instead of stopping, he simply kissed me and pushed the finger in as far as he could . . . Damn, he had long fingers! I claw at his back to try and get him to stop, but he doesn't relent.

"Shizuo! Ahhh, stop! I don't care if you're bigger, I'm not gonna bottom to the likes of you!" I screamed, my red irises seeming to glint like rubies in the glares of a hawk. Shizuo snorted.

"But you seem to be enjoying it, right? It can't be that bad." Hooking his finger upwards abruptly, I arched my spine up, grinding against him. I was hot. Everything around me was just so utterly, fucking hot! Sweat was dripping down my face and my body was still wet from the excess bath water that had caked to my skin. Striking that same spot again with more vigor, I tossed my head upwards, moaning loudly.

'Fuck, if that didn't wake up my neighbors, then I don't know what the hell would.'

Shizuo grinned, cheekily. "Still want me to stop?"

I bite my lip at the suddenly hard decision I had to make. I have never bottomed before and dammit . . ., I had an ego! But either way, the only way we were going to have sex was with the stubborn brute topping, so I guess I have no choice. My face turned pink as I looked away and mumbled the word "no".

"Good." And with that, the blond shoved another finger in, scissoring. My mouth parted, a trail of drool escaping, my entire body flushed. I couldn't help thinking about how dirty I probably looked right now. I could probably easily be confused with some bitch in heat the way things were going.

My thoughts were cut short as Shizuo added yet another finger. "What are you doing, d-damn brute! That's too soon!" I tried to shy away, but Shizuo's bigger body easily had me pinned.

It felt weird. In most cases like these ones, one would think to use lube, or at the very least saliva, but then again, I have to take into consideration that this is a Neanderthal I'm paring with here.

"You like it," was his simple reply as he curved his fingers up deeply into my walls. I arched my back and moaned. Fuck . . ., it hurt . . . and I kind of liked it. Does that make me a masochist? I pushed myself forward and captured the blonde's lips in a bruising kiss. I rubbed my crotch against the blonde in a desperate attempt to get some friction going . . . . ., fuck; I WAS a bitch in heat!

Shizuo chuckled softly. "You like that, huh? Maybe I should . . . add something bigger." He smirked, as he continued thrusting his long fingers in and out of me, occasionally brushing against my prostate, which earned long, drawn out and appreciative moans to escape my lips, involuntarily.

His other free hand continued to play with my body, as my hips grinded up to meet his. If I wasn't so engulfed in pleasure, I would tell him how much his dirty talk sucked . . ., but I couldn't think about that right now. My mind was swimming in pleasure and these were only his fingers!  
"A-Ahh S-Shizu-chan . . ." He seemed to like my response because he leaned down and sucked on my exposed neck. Subconsciously, I stretched it to give him more access. The blonde sucked hard and left a red love mark. He licked the redden flesh as an apology, but the apology was short lived, because he just went to mark another spot on my neck.

I blinked through lust fogged eyes. Wait . . . Why am I letting him do this? I have clients who come see me daily . . . Hickeys can be a bitch to hide; but that didn't matter at the moment, because as I thought all this, the brute had taken his fingers out!

"Shizuo! W-hy did you stop?" I growled, upset. What is his problem?! My body was obviously in need and I couldn't think straight. He can't just play with me however he wants. That's my job!

He didn't answer and I was about to yell again, when I abruptly felt something entering me. . . . _Something big._

"N-nggh, S-Shizu-chan . . ."

He pushed himself into me and I felt like he was going to split me into two! He is by far the biggest I have ever had in me . . ., which wasn't saying much, since I was never on bottom before.

What am I saying? I can't give into this brute!

I flip our positions so that his back is now on the floor and I am straddling his hips. With a sadistic smirk, I start to lower myself down on his cock until he is fully within me. If I am going to get penetrated then I'm going to be in control, dammit!

Shizuo didn't seem to mind the sudden position switch honestly and in fact only seemed to be more turned on by it, as he watched me with greedy eyes, his cock being swallowed up by my tight hole.

I groaned, my body tense, as I slowly lowered myself. I really hadn't gotten used to the feeling yet, to be honest, but I was tired of waiting.

I needed this and I need it now.

Deciding to just suck it up, I slammed down.

.

I nearly screamed, my body shaking. He gasped breathlessly, surprised by my actions.

"G-greedy flea, bastard; you trying . . . to split yourself in half?!"

I panted, sweat sticking to my toned body in every crevice. "Nnngh, why do you . . . have to be so big?!"

He looks perplexed for a moment then starts to laugh at me. Hey! _Don't_laugh! I'm in pain here! He doesn't seem to care though and tries to lift me up to pull me back down. I let out a deep moan and throw my head back in pleasure and pain.

"S-Stop, i-it . . . h-hurts!" I plead, but he forces me up once again, only to be pulled back onto his hard rod.

"You can take it." He says calmly. How is he so calm during this?!

In my mix of pleasure and pain, I forced myself a moment to think straight. Alright . . ., if that's how the brute wants to play it, then I'm stealing my dignity back. I'll make the brute cum first. He's a virgin, so it shouldn't be too hard. They're usually more sensitive from my experience.

I held my breath and sank down, squeezing my whole insides against his hardened manhood, holding back a shiver. Leaning forwards, I began peppering sensual kisses down the brute's chest. His reaction was quite comical. First surprise, followed by groans, as I bit and nibbled the flesh, tonguing it softly in afterwards.

I smirked against his heated skin and bit down, testing my grounds. To my surprise, he grabbed my hair and yanked my head up to meet his lips. Now who's the bitch in heat?

I twist around and force him to thrust into different angles, earning a moan with each move. This is almost too easy~

Grinning satisfactory, I clawed my nails down the blonde's back. He hissed, arching upwards into me, a frown evident on his face. Oops~ Guess the monster doesn't like it as rough as I thought. Ghosting my hands upwards again, I allowed my finger pads to press in softly, before ghosting down his abdomen. His body shivered and one particularly hard buck upwards into me, released a loud and guttural moan to spoil from my lips.

"Aaah, nnngh." For a virgin, Shizu-chan wasn't half bad.

Sure he doesn't have any tact or skill, but his sheer determination and size made up for it. He pulls his hips back and suddenly thrusts in rather roughly . . . right . . . into . . . my . . . prostate . . .!

"A-Ahhh! O-Ohh! S-Shizzy. . ." My vision goes white and he starts to abuse the area. He really does learn quick in this sort of thing . . ., but I can't give up . . . I roll my hips with each thrust and try, in vain, to try and make the brute cum before I couldn't hold it anymore.

"F-fuck. Getting desperate, are we?" I groaned into the blonde's ear, a breathy whisper, my breath tickling the soft flesh. I sucked the lobe into my mouth, teasingly nibbling the skin, and simultaneously bringing my hips down, earning a particularly loud groan this time around.

"Heh . . ., does Shizu-chan, haaa, have sensitive ears?" I chuckled. His reaction . . . was almost cute. I released the ear from my mouth, but not before giving it a sultry suck, and blowing on it once more. My hands played down the blonde's body again, starting from his upper neck and downwards. His body trembled harshly, his breathing ragged. He was getting close; I could tell.

He starts to thrust up more into me, frantically, as if he were racing his orgasm. I picked up the pace as well, and felt my needy cock about to blow . . ., but I wasn't going to come first. I lean down and capture his pert nipple into my mouth, and suck on it harshly.

"F-Fuck! I-izaaaayaaa . . . ."

And suddenly, making one last deep thrust inside me, his body shivered and convulsed.

"Nnngh, aaaaaaah! Shi-Shizu!" I moaned aloud, as thick, hot, creamy cum filled my insides.

"Izaaaaayaaa!" His groan almost sent me over the edge.

I grinned in victory. Quick thrusts hit my prostate dead on, as Shizuo attempted to reciprocate the pleasure of climax, wrapping a fist around my cock, and jerking me off.

I let out a deep moan and released my seed onto both of our chests. I moan out again as I ride out my orgasm, before coming to a slow stop. "A-ahh . . . Shizu-Chan . . ." I open my eyes and see . . . . the . . . the bastard fell asleep on me!

* * *

**[****time skip]**

_-Shizuo's POV-_

I groaned tiredly. My head was _KILLING_ me. What the hell did I do last night?

Oh right, I got piss ass drunk and slept with my worst enemy.

I mentally kicked myself. How commendable. Not only that, but I was at work with Tom-san with this killer hang over, all the while my bastard of a one night stand, decided to spam my phone with text messages that read how to have proper sex. My face glowed red.

'_Dammit! Why the hell did I even get drunk?!'_ I glance down at my phone and see a picture message coming through. Great, what the hell is he sending me now? I watch the red bar fill, before my phone is suddenly swiped from my hands!

"Tom!" I yell, but he keeps the phone out of reach. "You gotta relax, Shizuo; you've been growling at your phone all day. Let it be for awhile."

I tense up, but relax knowing he is right. The phone vibrates in Tom's hand, and we both stare at the picture on the phone.

Immediately I flush red and nearly feint at the site.

On the screen was a picture of me, asleep in a bed, with my arms tied above my head to the bed post, and Izaya . . .

I was _horrified._

Snatching the phone from Tom's hand, I quickly murmured a "be right back", and headed to the nearest alley.

.

. .

. . .

. . . . .

. . . . . .

"GOD DAMN, FLEA!"

'What the fuck does he think he's doing?!'

In the picture sent, Izaya was straddling my hips, my pants and boxers pulled down just enough to show off my obvious erection, as Izaya's mouth sank low over the tip.

I flushed red in a mixture of anger, embarrassment, and . . . shamefully hormones. About to click the call button on my phone to get a hold of the informant, I hesitated as I saw there was a text message attached.

The message was simple, but it made me realize the severity of my actions.

_'I stole Shizu-chan's virginity, lol'_

I crush my phone without a second thought. I'm sure Tom would understand. Cursing, I vowed to never get drunk again, and to beat Izaya into an inch of his life the next time I saw him.

"Fuck you, Flea." My head met the back of the alley wall softly, as I groaned. I swear in this moment of silence, I could almost hear the flea's smartass comment back: "Yeah, but we already did that, Shizu-chan~"

Fuck my life.

* * *

**A.N.- **

**CloudsofSand: We can't write one shots! XD They end up WAY LONGER then intended.  
**

**Slayers64: LOL but we had fun~ Practice smutt ftw  
**

**R&R plz~  
**


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